Author: Rodney V. Smith
Genre: Paranormal, Fantasy
Publisher: Lost Bajan Publishing
Pages: 332 pages
Release Date: February 13, 2018
My Rating: ♥♥♥♥
Blurb: Nobody expects to get turned into a vampire, especially a guy like Bob. Everybody hopes that if they somehow get transformed into a vampire, they will instantly become some kind of superhero vampire out of the movies. Bad news guys: not gonna happen. More likely than not, you’re gonna be one of the poor clueless bastards hanging out on Thursday nights with Bob in his vampire support group.
You may think you know what being a vampire is supposed to be like, but Bob is here to set you straight. He’s made it his personal mission to get answers about the reality of being a vampire. He’s been shot, stabbed, thrown off rooftops, survived bad coffee and endured crippling boredom – all in the name of answering the eternal question of what it means to be a vampire.
If you think you might be a vampire, this is the book for you.
Take everything you know about vampires – no reflection, can’t eat human food, brooding parasites, burned by holy water, death by wooden stake – and throw it out the window. Seriously, do it. Because Bob in So I Might Be A Vampire breaks all those rules – and then some.
At the opening of the story, a scene is set: wide blazing desert, a muscle car driven by a bottle blonde dressed in black with a mission, Bob the vampire trapped in the trunk. In short, all hell had broken loose and the reader is thrust into it.
What I loved: the premise of the story is comedic and witty. Bob doesn’t beat around the bush about how sucky being a vampire is and how society paints it with a Hollywood brush – glamorous, easy, a rich life of opportunity. It’s none of those things and Bob lays it all out.There’s Bob’s expectations or the best version of what could have happened – which is almost always something melodramatic or exaggerated, and then there is what actually took place. I really liked how unreliable Bob was, as I felt it mirrors the reality of human beings as a whole. We all have our own versions of truth and then there is THE TRUTH.
I really liked and disliked Bob, which is not a bad thing at all. I think it’s healthy when a reader is conflicted. It’s a sign they’ve gotten under our skins. His in-your-face-this-is-who-I-am attitude steers clear of the typical characters you might find in a vampire book. He’s blunt, loud, has a foul mouth, is a drunk – things we normally wouldn’t expect in an immortal because all those centuries on Earth must have refined a vampire, smoothed their edges….right? Wrong.
Bob is so flawed he’s relatable, which is why I kind of like him.
So I Might Be a Vampire might be a little tropey and at times cliche, but with all the hilarious moments that happen and the blunt perspective of Bob, it makes for a funny book that takes a break from tired stereotypes of what it means to live life as a vampire. I don’t want to spoil anything, but there were parts of this book where I was laughing because I couldn’t believe a vampire would do what Bob was doing. In a rare way, this realization worked for me.
All I have to say is “poor Bob”. Life, whether your dead or not, sucks. No pun intended :D
What I wasn’t crazy about:
Firstly, the narration was a little difficult for me. Though predominately told in first person, there were times when Bob would exclusively use “you” – as if talking directly to me. Although this only happened in a few chapters, it went on for a several pages, switching, and I found it jilting enough to break me out of the book. This might not be an issue for others, but it was definitely something I’d never encountered before. Secondly, there were times when Bob would crack jokes or make references to things I didn’t understand. I would reread them, wondering if this was intentional or if it was one of those phrases that go over my head. It didn’t happen often, but when it did, I felt like the odd one out in a group who just didn’t get the joke.
The overall story was a hoot. So I Might Be a Vampire is packed with irony, less-than-perfect characters, and a story that echoes the messiness of humanity with a fantasy twist. It’s not at all for children and doesn’t shy away from being blunt or raunchy, but it paints the perfect picture of everything we never expect when it comes to vampires and reveals that vampires are people too.
If you enjoy a good laugh and a character who is not at all what you’d expect, I recommend you sink your teeth into this one.
Dying to sink your fangs into this one? Check out So I Might Be A Vampire:
Lost Bajan Publishing (www.lostbajanpublishing.ca)